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Two Useful Wine Paperbacks

By Darryl Beeson

Malcolm Kushner has done the often too stuffy world of wine a favor by writing the long awaited book "Vintage Humor for Wine Lovers." To this point, wine humor was generally limited to an occasional cartoon in The New Yorker, to often about a wine snob.

The drinking of wine has induced smiles since the beginnings of civilization. Kushner delivers hundreds of funny wine thoughts in a Henny Youngman delivery throughout the book. For example, he presents a three columned chart of ambiguous wine descriptors for situations when you are called upon to describe a wine. Pick three random numbers between zero and fifteen could result in "a rustic, sensuous titration" or "amusingly precocious aroma." Who among you will challenge your judgment if they don't know what you said.

There are witty comebacks to use with rude or incompetent restaurant employees, humorous toasts to use when the need arises, and much more. He writes of a little girl watching her dress for a formal wine-tasting party. As her dad donned his tuxedo, she warned "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "Why not?" he asked. The little girl replied, "It always gives you a headache the next morning."

Says author Kushner, "Sparkling wine and sparkling wit. They go together like, well, wine and wit." You can give this gift of laughter (paperback, 168 pages, $9.95 US) by calling 831-425-4839 or by emailing mk@kushnergroup.com.   Volume discounts are available.

Taking a more serious approach, author Joe Borrello (also author of "Recipes From the Wineries of the Great Lakes") in his most recent book, "Ask the Wine Guy- Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Wine, but Didn't Know Who to Ask," written much like a catechism or a website's FAQ. He details the most often asked questions, followed by concise, clear answers. The advantage here is that he answers the questions that you didn't know, until now, that you had.

The book covers simple questions such as how to select a wine to serve with certain dishes (no hard and fast rules, but general rules of thumb), if a guest brings a bottle of wine to your hosted dinner party, should it be served (unless they inquired earlier about the meal, it should be treated as a gift and not opened). The book deals with more complex questions as well. There are also some useful food recipes designed to work well with wine.

Joe Borrello is the executive director of Tasters Guild International, a wine and food appreciation society, and judges wines throughout the world. To obtain "Ask the Wine Guy" (Michael P. Spradlin, paperback, 162 pages, $15), ask your favorite book seller or call the publisher at 810-664-8406.

Darryl Beeson travels the world looking for great wine values. In the past, he has been wine steward or cellar master for The Mansion on Turtle Creek, Voltaire, and The Adolphus Hotel. Not one for stuffiness or secret handshakes relative to wine, this Texan might now be described as a "ki-yi-yippee sommelier, sommelier." Beeson reports on wine, spirits, food and travel for numerous publications.

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