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The Traveling Curmudgeon

By Jon Winokur

Reviewed by David Currier

As a world traveler, I too have personal horrific stories to relate. If I tell friends that I spent Christmas at the finest hotels in Budapest, they nod politely. If I mention the New Year's Eve that I arrived at my hotel in London and was told that they had no reservations for me, that my confirmation number was bogus, that they had no rooms available, and that the space that was finally provided was so small that to open my suitcase (on the twin bed) required that my traveling companion spend some quality time in the loo, my friends want more details!

In spite of the fact that most travel is rewarding, the less than rewarding aspects always catch peoples' attention more quickly. Does our generation have such freedom to travel that we have become completely blasé about our friends’ adventures?

Face it! Some travelers are never happy with their experiences, no matter their own station in life, nor how awe inspiring the experiences of their journeys. These folks expect the Taj Mahal to be 'foreign', but they want it to be located five minutes from a major shopping mall where they will be comforted by the likes of Tiffany, Nordstrom, or Burger King. Unfortunately for this type of traveler, you can't always 'have it your way' - be it a burger, a Manhattan cocktail, or even bouillabaisse in the south of France which “isn't as good as the one I had at the restaurant French Connection in Islip, NY”. 

There may be more of these types of cranky people around than you'd think.  However, most of them are of the Dave Barry types - looking for the laugh in it all. (Dave, I too got trapped at New York's Hotel Shpennsylvania!)

Anyway, Jon Winokur's The Traveling Curmudgeon, a check-out counter anthology of quotes and comments by some of the world's most well known travelers - writers, performers, musicians, politicians, people just like you and me, provides more than a few laughs and a pile of chuckles about travel experiences around the world.

L.A. to me is like Vegas - but the losers stay in town. (Jerry Seinfield)

When it's three o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London (Bette Midler)

Detroit. Cleveland without the glitter. ( Anonymous)

Americans are rather partial to food. You will be struck by the number of overweight people. (Guides Bleus)

We shared a room [in a Turkish hotel] with a Belgian couple.  My sheet was littered with the hairs and scent of the previous occupant. When I complained about my dirty linen to the hotel man, he immediately rushed up, apologized, and turned it over. (Rick Steves)

Frankly, The Traveling Curmudgeon is that secret fix to all our cravings to feast on someone else's disaster! To smugly think "that would never happen to me".

It's the perfect in-flight entertainment when the B-movie you just paid five bucks to see has a soundtrack that would make Thomas Edison cringe. Or read it (all of it) while waiting for that sexy beach-waiter to deliver a frothy piña colada to your secluded palm tree on the beach - mañana, if he/she remembers you at all.

Published by Sasquatch Books, Seattle

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