Happy Honeymoons

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Photo by Dave Shultz

Ever since I was a small child, I have been fascinated by the fantasy of honeymoons. So when I got married 28 years ago, I planned what I thought was the perfect honeymoon. We'd spend the first night at the brand-new Playboy Resort in Lake Geneva, and then on to the Florida condo of a fabulously wealthy friend of my husband's uncle.

It was a good plan, but the honeymoon was a disaster. The Playboy resort was so new, the doors didn't work. Just as I changed into my honeymoon lingerie, my husband was locked in the bathroom for an hour. When he finally got out, my passion had cooled, and so had the room. The heat was turned off. I huddled in the midst of our romantic round bed swathed in blankets. It was one of the early round beds, where they basically cut the corners off a double bed. If you moved even an inch off center, someone's feet were sticking off the edge. When we finally left our room, we'd missed dinner and breakfast the next morning. We've been married a long time now, but I still get really grumpy if you don't feed me on schedule.

On the the luxury condo. It wasn't exactly as promised. The friend did own it..but it wasn't his personal condo. It was kind of a low budget apartment hotel for very senior citizens. We had 2 stationery twin beds elevated for cardiac patients. All our neighbors were at least four times our age. Not the most romantic week of my life, but we have lived happily ever after. So I have a passion for second and third and fourth honeymoons—even if I keep going with the same person.

— Madelyn Miller



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